And then stress hits.

peace,

Ahhhh, thanks to my ladies who got what I was about in that last post. Nothing like a good crush to make you feel giddy.

Seriously, though? I've caught a couple of the dua's headed my way, and thanks to everyone, because it ain't over. The stress of the past week and what's coming up in the next two weeks are requiring serious amounts of prayer already. Please remember me in your duas.

When I took the job I have, I was hired even though I made it plain that I don't own a car. Owning a car was quite clear in the job description. Now, this later caused a brief hubbub later, when I asked my exec director to join Zipcar. She was quite firm in stating that my having a car was part of the job description. She and my then-boss went over it, since they'd hired me knowing I didn't have a car, and Zipcar wouldn't cost anything, and I drew up a proposal to that effect, I ended up with Zipcar and use it to fulfill my business duties.

But seriously? My travel to this point is now such that I'm paying $250 per month just for the privilege of using a car. As my mother exclaimed, "That's a (car) note!" And it is, nearly, but I don't have a down payment for a car, nor the $200 per month that I'd be charged for insurance here (yeah, so much for the gecko). My aunt won't sell me her car, so I'm eating that cost. At this rate I'm barely breaking even since my job pays well... and it costs well over average to live in the DC metro area. Holla if ya hear me.

I'm applying to various and sundry second jobs, and not hearing from any, but I've got to find a way to resolve the car/cash issue quickly.

Also, inshaAllah I'll move on the 28th of Feb. I still don't know where I'm moving, but hey, MashaAllah, I have a couple of options! One is convienient but... would put me in an barely tenable situation islamically; the other would make for a LOT more commuting time and travel and thus cash when I don't have any to spare (or, barely tenable economically), plus the girls there are being mad shady about my papers and credit report, making me think they've got someone else on the line (hey, I have someone else on the line, so I can't blame them, but they need to give me a decision...). There's got to be a way out of this. Please keep on praying, y'all.

So. The crush? Still doing the facebook pattycake. Whatever. It was fun to think about. Still is. I wish I didn't welcome that distraction so much.

Today I miss Puerto Rico fiercely, when the weather here turns 50 degrees, and I forget that this is freezing cold. I miss humid winds plastering my skirt to my calves, the everyday amazement of the sunsets there. I miss being able to hear Frankie Ruiz like it's nothing, meeting friends who show warmth and not just recognition when I see them on the street. Much as I struggled there, it is a place of beauty alhamdulillah. Days like these tell me I'm going back, one day, maybe to pull my husband and family with, maybe not, but I can't stay away.

peace and love
me