Sunday, November 20, 2011

Too done. Through. Fed up.

assalamu alaikum I need your dua'a. I'm not doing so well in school. By which I mean that I'm failing. Graduate school is a different beast than undergrad; but for me the problem is truly my frustration with the graduate work. If I were working on a second bachelor's degree, I'd only have one more class after this semester. Because no one has switched from master's to bachelor's at this point, the school of nur.sing I'm in is unlikely to allow me to do it, according to an administrator. But because of the way nur.sing works, and a big part of my frustration is, when I graduate whether with a master's degree, a bachelor's degree, or an associate's degree, I start off making the same salary in most places. One exception is the federal government including the military. That's a tough place for me to work. The other thing is that I feel duped, because I still have to go to school for another two years in order to become a midwife. At least the goal is very very clear in my mind. I WANT TO BE A MIDWIFE. THAT IS THE POINT OF SCHOOL. Another part of my problem is that I'm isolated within the program, and am not getting the help or support I need no matter how much I ask for it. I ask for study groups, and people flake out or decline. And one thing about my alma mater was that I rolled in a crew that was DEEP. There was always someone at the library, no matter the hour, to sit at a table with. We didn't have to talk, but my thing is that I need people WITH me. The people in this program are so darned CLOSED and I feel isolated. I'm very unhappy about this. I'm done. ~twenny